To go or not to go? That is the question…

Hello my peeps, long time since Payazaro has given any love to his blog. I’m gonna do a better job of putting some more posts with the latest shenanigans of my current adventure. As I mentioned in my last post, I decided to peace out from Mexico and visit family in Nicaragua. I was once told that, “in this life, the only thing guaranteed is death.” Tomorrow is not promised, yesterday cannot be changed, and even though the present can be dictated by so many external factors out of our control, we nonetheless can select the direction our life will take. Unfortunately, sometimes that requires a passport.

I don’t understand people that get a passport and never use it. If you read the previous sentence with a sense of guilt, either use it or at least open it up every day and see your pretty little face because you just paid a lot of money for a one-picture album.

A couple of months ago I met an Australian couple and hosted them in Manzanillo for a couple of days. From our first interactions, I couldn’t help but notice that I felt conflicted with what they represented and where I stood in life at that moment. Let me explain…

Sometimes in life what we do is deliberate, other times where we go and what we do can be serendipitous. This Ozzie couple had worked a solid 6 months to save up around 40 thousand Australian dollars between the two of them. Their plan was to travel for a year non-stop around the world and surf the many waves this world has to offer. By the time they got to Manzanillo, they had already visited most of Europe, South America, Central America, Southern Mexico, and were on their way to the US. They created their own circumstances and took all the steps necessary to make sure their goal was made a reality. That, my friends, is as deliberate as you can get. Payazaro, on the other hand, had just come to terms with losing his job and not being able to attend his sister’s wedding. After a month hiatus of introspective analysis (and surprisingly little to no beer), I realized that the circumstances imposed on me were 1) obviously unplanned, and 2) a serendipitous opportunity to take a summer trip of a lifetime. What’s the difference between the Ozzie couple and myself? They have 40 G’s and their trip is a year-long. Other than that, this world is truly for each and every one of us to conquer.

Coincidently, the day I made up my mind that I would take off for the summer, I found the journal my high school mentor gave me the summer before my freshmen year in college. It had two journal entries in the last 6 years with only two pages filled with writing. My high school mentor would be so proud ☺ The second journal entry, however, documented an important message I left myself and had forgotten about. I was debating to take a week trip to visit one of my best friends in Boston. The only thing keeping me from doing it was money. In the journal read the following:

“Money comes and goes, but experiences and explorations plant the seeds that last a lifetime. I started looking at plane ticket prices today and have decided that I will purchase mine. I have limited myself many times by being unselfish. But you know, sometimes you gotta be. If you don’t take care of yourself, who will? Those around you who love you will love you, but they have their own lives to live, as do you. How do you wanna live it? Investing in your future at times means investing right now. You don’t know what person you’re gonna meet, what place you’re gonna go to, what experience you’re gonna have, who will say something significant to you, how you will react and how that’s going to shape the person you’re gonna become or be…”

Looking back, that trip was more than I expected and it cemented a life-long friendship with a close friend that eventually came to visit me in Manzanillo. Money was also the only thing keeping him from coming. Perhaps we were a little broke or had to really limit our expenses afterward, but the experience and memories obtained were invaluable. With this in mind, I no longer felt guilty about using some of my savings for a trip like this. I have no doubt it will definitely be worth it. Professional goals will be temporarily postponed. Besides, I had actually forgotten about my lab-rat-like ability to improvise and always find my cheese at the end of the maze. I always have and always will.