Mexican Roaches

I believe everyone has seen a cockroach aka “roach” at some point in their life. They’re ugly crawling critters that have roamed this earth probably long before Adam and Eve. Roaches have no boundaries and no matter how many you step on, they will come back. The rainy season is about to hit Manzanillo and I couldn’t help but notice how many roaches came out of the sewer last year around this time. I feel like they breed 9 months of the year and prepare for a 3 month war with mankind.

Whenever I step on one I can’t help but think about that Indiana Jones scene where he and his sidekick are exploring a cavern filled with roaches and the kid says, “I feel like I’m stepping on fortune cookies”. I guess they do make that kind of crunch sound. But even stepping on them is not a guaranteed kill. They are the masters of playing dead. I’ve often left a roach “dead” in my patio for the rest of its homies to see what they’re dealing with only to come back an hour later and see it gone! Cutting their heads won’t do the job because they are known to survive up to 9 days without their heads! Who in the hell discovered this? One thing is for sure, some scientist had to prove it for it to become a fact.

According to an uncle of mine, you can freeze a roach and once it unfreezes it will come back to life and run away the first chance it gets. I’ve been tempted to try it but too disgusted in attempting to catch one and keeping it alive. Imagine it’s tiny little hairs and multiple legs wiggling and rubbing on your hand and then have it crawl across your arm and potentially into your mouth! Ok, maybe not, but I fear that potentially happening to me.

My high school teacher once told me a roach could survive a nuclear war. I hope we never find out 🙂 http://www.roachcom.net/rofacts/ is filled with crazy facts about roaches but my favorite is the following: “When a male cockroach is interested in a female, he gives her a wrapped gift and takes her out to dinner–well, sort of. Males transfer sperm to females in a nice, “gift wrapped” package called a spermatophore. Some males cover the package in a protein-rich wrapping that she can eat (yum!) to obtain nutrients to raise her young.” Hmmm…Awesome?

I remember American peeps in the US would apply the “illegal immigration dilemma” to the roach infestation occurring in the US. Excuse me? You cannot blame Mexicans for that problem. Why? Two words: “fluttering wings.” Our breed of Mexican roaches indeed fly with grace to any home they want. But NEVER, I repeat, NEVER did I see a flying roach in the US. I’m even willing to go as far as making the statement that it’s American laziness that’s actually rubbing off on THEIR roaches. The suckers are too lazy to fly. Take that! OK, I feel better. The process of writing this post has allowed me to bond with my fellow Mexican roach. I might just pardon the death of one lucky roach, enslave it and keep it tied with a string to a nail in the middle of my patio. I’ve always wanted a house pet and that just might do 🙂 It’s free, small, low maintenance, and replaceable!